Christian husbands ought to give their wives a short biblical test every now and then. This post suggests the kind of biblical test husbands may want to take their wives through.
(Hint: The test is really aimed at the husbands!)
I recently took my wife through this test during our devotion time. This test may be easier for wives than for husbands; try it and see.
To get started you will need: a Bible or two, a blank sheet(s) of paper, and a pen or pencil.
- Open your Bible(s) to Ephesians 5.
- Pray for this time together.
- Read and meditate on Ephesians 5:25-33.
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. (Ephesians 5:25-33 ESV)
Briefly discuss how Jesus loved the church. Of course, Jesus gave His life for the church, but what did that look like in action? How did Jesus treat His bride, minister to her, etc.?
Now the hard part – the test!
Men, ask the following questions, don’t get defensive; listen and take notes.
- In what ways am not giving myself up for you?
- In what ways do I hinder your walk with God?
- In what ways do I help your walk with God?
- Are there any areas in our marriage that you feel we are not of one flesh?
- How can I better demonstrate my love for you?
Men, take your wife’s answers to the cross and pray over them deeply.
The above exercise is one suggestion of how husbands may have gospel conversations with their wives. Husbands, use your own questions and methods if you wish, but be encouraged to engage your wife spiritually to find out how to better love and sanctify her in the word. If we husbands are not engaging our wives regularly and leading them spiritually then we are failing at the primary ministry that God has given us. Remember, husbands and wives are joint heirs of the grace of life (1 Peter 3:7) and an excellent wife is her husbands crown (Proverbs 12:4).
Husband, love your wife – pray with her, lead her, disciple her, protect her, sacrifice for her, die for her.
For what it’s worth…