Ethics: Pastors Refuses Baby Dedication

What would you do Wednesday!

It is Sunday morning just after announcements during worship service. The pastor stands at the pulpit and calls some families up for baby dedication as is done in some Baptist churches.

Eight families go forward and are standing side-by-side facing the congregation. A young lady in her 20’s, sitting right in front of you, stands up and takes her 1-year-old baby forward. You know the lady’s first name, but don’t really know her otherwise outside of chatting on Sunday mornings.

The lady stands with her baby whispering back and forth with the pastor for a moment as everyone looks on. She then turns and walks slowly back to her seat. Tears are streaming down her face.

You lean forward, concerned, and gently ask if she is okay. She whispers that the pastor would not include her in the baby dedication because he was born out of  wedlock and she is a single mother.

What would you do?

  • Show her empathy, but explain that the pastor knows best.
  • Show her empathy and tell her you will talk to the pastor afterward.
  • Show her empathy and tell her you will help find a new church.
  • Stand up, outraged, and announce what just happened to the whole congregation.
  • Or…

Here I blog…


p.s. The inspiration for this post comes from Single mom: Son born out of wedlock snubbed by Winans’ church.

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tagged as , in Christianity,Church Issues,Culture,ethics,faith

{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }

1 LouiseGoode October 23, 2013 at 11:13 am

I would speak to the pastor afterward, armed with scripture. Opinions can vary, but the Word of God is solid.

2 AndrewLindsey October 23, 2013 at 11:53 am

The problem is conducting the waterless infant baptism in the first place!

3 Jake Swink October 23, 2013 at 12:49 pm

If she is a member of the church, she should definitely be allowed to go through with the dedication! 
This makes me angry…

4 Mark Lamprecht October 23, 2013 at 2:21 pm

Jake Swink you make sense to me.

5 James Ellis October 23, 2013 at 2:42 pm

New church here WE come. For the church to allow her there but deny her child as being acceptable to God has them so far from the truth it is time to leave. I would question the pastor but not rebuke an elder in the church two wrongs don’t make a right

6 Ellen October 23, 2013 at 9:30 pm

The pastor did the right thing, if he had went on with the dedication he would had sent out the wrong message to the congregation that’s gets ok to fornicate

7 Mark Lamprecht October 23, 2013 at 10:00 pm

@Ellen  I’m curious how a baby dedication sends the message that it is okay to fornicate?
Or, maybe from that perspective the message may be that if you have a baby out of wedlock the church doesn’t want to help bring him to Jesus.

8 particularbaptist October 23, 2013 at 10:48 pm

If the woman is a member then there is no reason to deny the blessing, but even if that wasn’t so what scriptural reason can there be in denying any child God’s blessing?  If this woman wants to raise her child in the faith then why would you put such a blockage in her path?

9 Jerry Smith October 23, 2013 at 11:31 pm

AndrewLindsey  Right, he did something that is not scriptural & it caused trouble for him & that church.

10 James Ellis October 23, 2013 at 11:41 pm

I have never seen a baptist church do a waterless infant baptism. I have seen dedication service though where they acknowledge a life created by God and commit to raising the child as God’s creation that will still have to confess Christ and be Baptized

11 minka March 9, 2015 at 8:09 am

My pastor just refused to dedicate my baby born out of wedlock when I asked him yesterday. I’ve been going to that church for 22 yrs. I’ve been in tears since. It hurts. It’s not my precious daughter’s fault she was conceived outside of marriage. It makes me want to stop going to church but I just can’t find it in my heart that God has anything against me and my baby so I’ll keep going :/

12 bhel May 14, 2016 at 11:35 am

parent mistake should not be carry out by the child that has nothing to do with it. If the Parent acknowledge and repent, have that Faith in their hearts that by dedicate the child is one of ways the blessing and God presence will be accompany the child as they grow and be guided by the truth then be gracious to both the parent and the child as ALL we are live by the GRACE of GOD day by day,


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